In the Name of Allah, the Most-Merciful, the Compassionate. “Say, O Prophet, I do not ask you for a reward for this message,only honor for our kinship.” (Qur’an 42: 23)
I were to speak of the elderly women I knew--our mothers and our grandmothers, those revered as the mothers of earlier generations--those I personally encountered were truly remarkable, extraordinary in the lasting influence they left within their homes.
Even now, when I recite the litanies (daily regular portions of supplications) or engage in remembrance--now that I am advanced in age, a grandfather with grandchildren--when I recite these supplications,
It is as if the voice of my maternal grandmother still echoes in my ears. I feel as if I am reciting with her very tongue. When we were young children, she would recite, and we would repeat the remembrances after her.
At night, she would recite for us the book of (Adhkar) by Imam al-Haddad, Sūrat Tabārak, and other supplications. Thus, from childhood, we were nurtured by the voices of these righteous grandmothers.
We witnessed how she lived in light of spirituality, remaining with us until she reached nearly a hundred years of age, never ceasing in the remembrance of Allah, Glorified and Exalted be He.
She remained in this state until she passed away between my mother’s arms, remembering Allah; the final word to leave her tongue was “Allah,” spoken before our very eyes.
This kind of upbringing--seeing a woman devoted to obedience, righteousness, uprightness, constant remembrance, and continual counsel against every wrong,
and there were many like her. Dozens of women we knew in our homes who embodied this righteousness. One of them would say to you, “Yesterday, I saw the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him).”
You would visit another and find her immersed in a righteous vision, glad tidings, light, spiritual insight, and deep understanding. You sit with a woman who is truly with Allah, and she draws you toward His Path as well.
Among the women of the household--particularly the elderly righteous ones--you encounter those whose hearts are entirely with God. Sitting with them lifts you completely beyond the realm of the world.
They appear in the worldly realm, yet the world has no claim upon them. Their hearts are entirely attached to Allah, and they speak of and are remembered only in His name,
the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) and the stories of the righteous.
Since the inception of the Prophet’s message, women in Islam have held a vital and indisputable role across all spheres of life, continuing to this day.
The women of the Prophet’s Household enjoyed a highly esteemed position, as they were role models emulated by both Muslim women and men alike.
O Aminah, rejoice! Praise be to the One who has bestowed this gift upon you.
By bearing Muhammad, you were bestowed by Allah with honor and delight.
Episode 11
The Women of the Prophet’s Household
Women have a great, profound, original, and essential role, yet their mention and recognition in books, narrations, and biographies is often very limited.
This is due to the nature of the position Allah has placed within them--the responsibility they bear, being the carriers of the inner foundation, the bearers of the family’s core.
We see the exterior of a house--the visible decoration--but the interior is hidden, and the foundations beneath are unseen, even though a house without its foundations will collapse.
Thus, women are the foundation, yet they do not appear prominently.
In truth, when speaking of women, we speak of the women of the Prophet’s Household, whether from his family (peace be upon him) or from the Ahl al-Kisā’ (the cloak), such as Lady Fāṭimah al-Zahrā’, or his daughters like Lady Zaynab and Umm Kulthūm.
Even later leading women of the Prophetic household, such as Lady Sakīnah or Lady Nafīsah--up to the present day--this household
continue to shin. It is a manifestation of leadership and prominence, and the Prophet’s family fills the world with this Prophetic spirit. We see it in the biographies of the Mothers of the Believers and in the lives of the pure women of the Household.
When we examine the biographies of the early women who migrated to Abyssinia, those who migrated to Madinah, and the women of Ansar, we find a remarkable breadth of diversity.
Women played a major role in calling to the religion of Allah, Glorified and Exalted, and in spreading the message of Allah.
The Prophet (PBUH) was not constantly sitting with the Companions instructing them, “Do this” or “Do not do that.” Rather, most of his life was a living example--he was the Messenger of Allah in practice.
This is what the practical Sunnah means. It is said that the action of one person among a thousand is more effective than the words of a thousand directed at one person. This is how proper upbringing occurs, this is how the women of the Prophet’s Household nurtured others: through lived practice.
They embodied this knowledge and these values themselves, so that those who lived alongside them, sat with them, and shared their lives would witness it and internalize it as character.
Therefore, when we ask how a person should raise their children, the answer is that one must first educate himself. If one disciplines and nurtures himself, his children will follow; but merely assuming the role of a speaking advisor will bring little benefit.
Therefore, from the very beginning, if we return to the noble women of the Prophet’s Household, starting with Lady Khadijah, then the Mothers of the Believers, and then our Lady Fatimah al-Zahra, despite the immense honor she holds,
and despite her great virtues, the many hadiths that speak of her, and her status as the leader of the women of the worlds, the reports concerning her life remain limited--few and scarce.
This indicates that their primary and essential role was nurturing and preparation--bringing forth and shaping these men.
The exemplary models of women in the life of the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, were fully suited to the nature of the message he brought.
When the noble women of the Prophet’s Household are mentioned, the mind should first turn to the foremost among them--our Lady Khadijah (may Allah be pleased with her and grant her His pleasure).
May Allah be pleased with the one who dwelt at the farthest part of Mecca,the wife of Prophet Muhammad--how honored we are by Khadijah.
Send peace upon her whenever you visit [her grave] in al-Hajun, with mercy;she surpassed all women by her virtue in Mecca.
During the time of the Prophet (PBUH) perfection was embodied in Lady Khadijah; she was even known before Islam as al-Tahirah (the Pure), and she possessed many noble qualities and defining traits.
She held a blessed and distinguished position, and she came from a devout family; she was aware of the nearness of the birth and mission of the Prophet of the end of time, and it appears that she patiently awaited this,
until she was granted the Prophet (PBUH). There are more than ten indications have been identified showing that Lady Khadijah, Umm Hind, may Allah be pleased with her, was following the Prophetic light.
From the earliest stage of lady Khadija’s life, she perceived that her female paternal cousin sought to marry ‘Abdullah [the Prophet’s father] and said to him, “There is a light within you.”
“I wish that it might reach me,” and she was the sister of Waraqah ibn Nawfal; and when Aminah married and gave birth to the Prophet (PBUH) Lady Khadijah was between fifteen and twenty years of age.
Through her cousin, she came to know of this continuous light and the deeply rooted secret embedded within the being of the Beloved (PBUH).
Lady Khadijah, undoubtedly, played the most prominent role, as she stood at the very beginning of the Message, at the moment when the divine light emerged from the heart of the Prophet (PBUH).
She was present at the very first moment of the descent of revelation; from the outset, she was fully prepared for it. Just as Aminah received the moment of birth, Khadijah received the moment of the Message.
She offered him what no one else did: at the very beginning, while he was still a young man, she gave herself and her wealth, married him, placed all her trade under his care, and thereafter supported and comforted him with both her person and her wealth.
This woman possessed all the means and opportunities that would enable her to live life in the finest way--as people say today, in every possible respect--and yet,
she herself proposed to the Beloved (PBUH). One of our esteemed scholars, our master Imam Abu Bakr al-Mashhur, may Allah have mercy on him,
one of the Imams of the Prophet’s Household in this era--he said: It is not that behind every great man stands a woman; rather, beside every great man stands a woman. He cited the Mother of the Believers, Khadijah, peace be upon her, as proof.
She stood beside the Beloved, comforted and supported him, and she was the first woman--indeed, the first person altogether after the Beloved to pronounce the two testimonies of faith after revelation descended upon him.
She was the most complete example of love for the Messenger of Allah (PBUH) for she loved him before Prophethood; she did not love him because of his Prophethood or his Message, but rather
she loved him before he was sent, when she witnessed the perfection of his character and saw in him what she had never seen in any man before.
Her love for him was a love of innate nature, and this points to the perfection of Lady Khadijah, for she looked with the eye of the heart, not the eye of sight; for had she looked with the eye of sight, yes,
she would have perceived the outward beauty of the Prophet (PBUH), but she looked with the eye of the heart and thus surrendered to him with her entire being--with her state, her wealth, and everything she possessed.
The first thing Lady Khadijah did was to believe him; one of the true signs of love is that I trust the one I love.
She believed him in a way that pleases Allah, recognizing that he was fully worthy of that trust. She was the first woman to have faith in him, in a moment I consider the pinnacle of love.
When our master, the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, first received revelation--a moment so momentous and new to him--he came down and said, “Cover me, cover me.” She reassured him and believed in him.
She did not see it as strange; on the contrary, she welcomed it as glad tidings.
She even spoke words that history will never forget, showing her wisdom, nobility, and inspired insight. When the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, felt some fear from the first revelation,
she said to him: “No, may Allah never disgrace you. You uphold the ties of kinship, bear burdens, relieve the distressed, and assist in the cause of truth,” or as she said, may Allah be pleased with her.
If there is anyone who truly understands these meanings, Lady Khadijah immediately said: “No, by Allah, your Lord will never disgrace you, Muhammad. Indeed, you maintain kinship, and you… and you… and you.” And she believed in him fully.
Not for a single moment did doubt or hesitation cross her mind.
Lady Khadijah lived as the first person to embrace Islam, in a way resembling what we might call the “Preserved Tablet” of the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him.
She possessed deep understanding, refined taste, and a noble spiritual state. Even Allah, Glorified and Exalted, sent her greetings, and our master Gabriel conveyed peace to her, saying: “Khadijah, convey my peace and greetings.”
Lady Khadijah could not fully explain what had befallen the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, as he came down trembling from the cave--she understood it only through love.
The words that strengthened his heart were also rooted in love, and love in its broadest sense; she perceived that Allah, Glorified and Exalted, would never let harm befall him. At that moment, she realized that nothing evil could touch him.
Where did this trust and insight come from? Before it became a special gift from Allah, Glorified and Exalted, it was cultivated in this lady through her experiences.
She lived through trials and observed that Allah does not waste the efforts of anyone who serves His servants, nor of anyone who is truthful, honest, performs good deeds, and guards against evil.
She heralded the best of humanity with her virtues and noble character.
In her household, the revelation of guidance arrived with the Prophet’s Message.
“Arise, O Muhammad, as a warner to the Great Lord of the nation,” the Beloved said. She listened attentively.
“I see its majesty…” she told him, “No, do not grieve over any calamity.”
Your righteous actions have benefitted every tribe.
Lady Khadijah--our master the Prophet (PBUH) said--believed me when people denied me, supported me with her wealth when people withheld from me, and Allah blessed me with children through her. She would say, “By Allah, Allah will never abandon you.”
“You bear the burdens, assist in the matters of truth, and attain what is lost.” She was thus a true manifestation of support for the Prophet (PBUH). May Allah be pleased with her and grant her His pleasure.
And what else did she do? She sheltered me and supported me with her wealth when people denied me. It was as though she said, “A wife and what she possesses belong to her husband.” She did not say, “This is mine and that is yours.”
Today, in Islamic jurisprudence, yes, a wife may separate from her husband with her wealth, and he has no right to claim it.
And if she gives it, it is by her generosity; if she does not, it is her right. Lady Khadijah was not like that, and by Allah, this is the greatest lesson for the women of our time.
When people today draw distinctions between themselves and their spouses-- “this is mine, that is yours”--they become two separate entities. But Lady Khadijah was as one with the Prophet (PBUH).
Never in our society or culture was there a concept of duality--the man and woman, the ruler and the ruled. There was no such idea; rather, there was complementarity.
Everyone knew that it is Allah, the Almighty, who created, apportioned, and arranged everything. Therefore, the idea of independence, where I see the other as entirely separate,
as if I am in one place and he is in another, never existed within the system of the Noble Revelation. Instead, it was understood that everyone should contribute to the extent they are able, within what Allah, Glorified and Exalted, has assigned to them.
The more a person does this, the closer they will be to Allah, the Almighty. The women of the Prophet’s Household preserved this meaning; not a single one of them tried to dispute with anyone.
Nor did anyone attempt to dispute with a woman regarding what Allah, Glorified and Exalted, had assigned. Therefore, the main focus was on how to fulfill what Allah had asked of them to the best of their ability.
Without concern for other incidental matters that arose later.
Our lady Khadijah, may Allah be pleased with her, was the first lady of this household, may Allah’s pleasure be upon her. When we examine her life, we find that she was the one who established the foundational structure with the Prophet (PBUH).
She was the one who protected, covered, endured, eased, and supported, and she was the one who nurtured the first men upon whom the Prophet (PBUH) relied.
Ali ibn Abi Talib was raised under her care. True, he was the Prophet’s cousin, but he was nurtured by Lady Khadijah because, as is known, the Prophet had adopted him.
And Zayd ibn Harithah, the great noble Companion, who is the only one mentioned by name in the Qur’an, was also raised in Lady Khadijah’s household. He grew up in her care.
May Allah be pleased with her. She suffered greatly after the boycott in the valley, a severe hardship, at an advanced age--over sixty-five--after the siege of the people of Banu Hashim.
She passed away in the tenth year of the Prophetic mission, when Lady Fatimah was fifteen years old, according to the narration in al-Bukhari and in the lexicon of al-Tabarani.
Fatimah held the garment of the Prophet and said, “O my father, where is my mother?” He said, “Your mother is in Paradise, O Fatimah,” and she wept. Allah, Glorified and Exalted, granted the Prophet
six children--sons and daughters--from her: Al-Qasim, Abdullah (Al-Tayyib Al-Tahir), Lady Zainab, Lady Ruqayyah, Lady Umm Kulthum, and Lady Fatimah Al-Zahra, the chaste and pure, all from their mother, may Allah be pleased with her.
Khadijah, may Allah be pleased with her, as the wife of the Prophet (PBUH) was his support, his refuge, and his beloved.
She was also the mother of Fatimah, may Allah be pleased with her. This means that all the rewards and high ranks of the Prophet’s Household during his lifetime are recorded in the Book of Good Deeds.
Khadijah, may Allah be pleased with her, will come on the Day of Resurrection with her sons and daughters, proud that she alone gave birth to children of the Messenger of Allah (PBUH). This is an honor, a special distinction.
May Your pleasure, O Allah, be upon her, O Lord of all creation. In her palace and bliss, she will enjoy happiness and comfort.
Whoever visits her for the sake of the chosen Prophet will enter Paradise, for she was his wife, known for her wisdom.
The Prophet’s hand placed soil on her grave.
This soil is blessed by Muhammad and his presence.
When discussing the role of our lady Khadijah, may Allah be pleased with her, in supporting our master Muhammad (PBUH),
we must not overlook the unique nature of the Prophet.
When we say that Lady Khadijah loved the Prophet, it is said that the Prophet benefited from this love--but I cannot say he benefited--
from the level of Prophethood itself. That would be inappropriate. Yet in his purely human aspect, apart from Prophethood, yes, he benefited.
But in the perfection associated with Prophethood, he needs nothing. How do we reconcile this? We must look at the Prophet in his human aspect, not solely in his prophetic aspect.
Considering both together: he is the perfect human model, and as a Prophet, he needs nothing. What does this mean?
It means that when a person advances in knowledge and closeness to Allah, even though Prophethood itself is not acquired, we say this figuratively,
he will be so firmly attached to Allah that he needs nothing to rely on. He requires no one’s love, no one’s assistance,
not even the support of his wife Khadijah with her wealth in trade, nor her help in difficult times, nor her standing by his side. Rather, he is the one who aids everyone.
From the perspective of Prophethood, this is the inner reality of the Prophet.
Yet outwardly, there are practical considerations. And for human affairs, there are rules. This is part of the Prophet’s perfection: outwardly, he appears to need support.
Outwardly, he needed Uthman’s support for the army in difficult times, Lady Khadijah’s support, and protection from others with sword and shield to guard against enemies.
But in truth, as our master Ali said, we would seek refuge with the Messenger of Allah when danger arose--the reality of Prophethood, the Muhammadan reality, needs nothing.
The outward Muhammadan form is the model we emulate. But when we speak of assistance,
whether from Lady Khadijah, may Allah be pleased with her, or from Uthman, Abu Bakr, or anyone else, it must always be understood in conjunction with the perfection of Prophethood: absolute lack of need.
O Allah, send blessings upon our master Muhammad, whose heart You filled with Your majesty,
and whose eyes You filled with Your beauty,
so that he became joyful, delighted, supported, and victorious. Peace and blessings be upon his family and companions.
Peacefully and abundantly. All praise is due to Allah for this.
The role of the women of the Prophet’s Household in serving Islam
continued after Lady Khadijah with those who followed her among the Mothers of the Believers, may Allah be pleased with them all.
Lady Aisha, may Allah be pleased with her, played a pivotal role in calling people to Allah, supporting the Messenger of Allah, (PBUH) and upholding the religion on his behalf.
She remained for many years after the passing of the Messenger of Allah (PBUH)
conveying all that she heard and understood from him, and issuing rulings in the religion of Allah.
She also corrected the Companions whenever they made mistakes in narrating from the Messenger of Allah (PBUH).
The lives of the Mothers of the Believers in the Household of our master, the Prophet (PBUH) are a manifestation of guidance. Indeed, in the Messenger of Allah, you have an excellent example for anyone who hopes in Allah and the Last Day and remembers Allah often.
Those with insight realize that the Companions transmitted the daytime of the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, while the Mothers of the Believers conveyed his nighttime.
They are among the most complete of people who truly understood the Quran. Allah, glorified and exalted, says in the Quran: “The believers are but brothers.”
Indeed, they were among the most complete in faith, sharing a brotherly bond full of affection and love. Why?
Because they were all allies of Allah, may He be exalted. A friend of Allah harbors no harshness, hatred, or malice in the heart.
Considering human nature, a small measure of jealousy can naturally arise.
The Prophet (PBUH) praised Lady Khadijah, may Allah be pleased with her, abundantly, for she was worthy of all perfection.
Lady Aisha, may Allah be pleased with her, was still young, and her understanding was not like that of Lady Khadijah. Thus, she occasionally felt jealousy.
Jealousy is a natural trait placed in women’s hearts by Allah. The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, would smile and ask, “Who is jealous?”
“Your mother is jealous here.” He was subtly reminding us never to disrespect Lady Aisha or think that jealousy is a bad trait in her--it was not a flaw.
“Your mother is jealous” indicates that simple jealousy is commendable in women, and simple jealousy is commendable in men. Still, the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, always spoke the truth.
He would speak of the virtues of Lady Khadijah, may Allah be pleased with her, out of his deep love. We excuse Lady Aisha and all the women,
as well as all the men who lived with the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him.
O Allah, send prayers, peace, and blessings upon our master Muhammad and his family,
as abundantly as befits Your perfection and in accordance with Your majesty.
Our master the Prophet (PBUH) would often have many women in his household, sometimes nine, and then Allah commanded him to limit it to five while sheltering four.
This was in accordance with various rulings in the Prophet’s household. He married the divorced, the widow, the elder, and the young.
He married the slender and the tall, the businesswoman and the diplomatic, those with children and those without, fathering children for the childless, and supporting people financially.
He provided for the Prophet’s household. The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, married free women, widows, a Coptic woman, a Jewish woman, a Muslim woman, free women, and the mothers of his children.
He married the daughters of his Companions Abu Bakr and Umar, as well as the daughters of his two enemies, Al-Harith, his daughter was Juwayriyah,, the daughter of the chief of Banu Mustaliq, and Safiyyah, daughter of Huyayy,
one of the leaders of Khaybar. The Prophet (PBUH) presents chapters of his biography with diverse stories, so that one may find in his life, household, and family a model to follow.
A model to emulate in the life of the Prophet (PBUH).
The discussion of the women of the Household extends to wives, daughters, and grandchildren. Each has a story that can serve as a model for the women of our time.
We seek intercession through the Beloved, the Chaste, and the Virtuous,
through the Prophet, and then through the Companions.
May this supplication be accepted.
O my Lord, I call upon You through the Messenger,
through Khadijah and the Chaste,
and through the noble forefathers. O my Lord, hasten the answer.
We need to study more examples of the women of the Household of our master Muhammad, peace and blessings be upon him,
to understand how we can emulate them in our lives today, and the trials and tribulations they endured.
This will be the topic of our next episode, by the will of Allah.
